Not Exactly as Planned...

Are you a
"make tomato sauce when life gives you tomatoes"
or not?

Hello my lovelies. I have a quandary...what do YOU do when things don't go as planned? I'll give you a brief synopsis (though keeping things brief is not exactly my forte):

I was part of a really amazing group of individuals that came together at this fantastic place and talked about what they coined, "blue sky thinking". Right up my alley, right? SO not. I'm not a big-picture thinker. I have to know something inside and out before having the authority to speak on it. For example, I only NOW can talk to my Year 11 students with conviction, after having known and taught them for 9 months, about the content of their exam. I've poured over those papers: have spent literally countless hours reviewing them, marking them, even taking them, but only NOW feel SURE about them. I feel I've mastered them now and only now. I didn't GET IT until now...I didn't feel confident about it until now. And that's really how I am about everything.

When I worked at the bank, I was reticent about doing everything until I could talk about the product inside and out with clients as well as colleagues. I had to breathe the mutual fund, GIC, or mortgage before I'd DREAM of talking about it. Martha Stewart's "make it until you make it" philosophy was certainly NOT what I was all about.

Fast forward to real time. Here I stand in a classroom, completely able to teach these kids things about their exam, but not having a full grasp on the content as a whole. It is a strange thing: I'm just not a big-picture thinker.

That said (because that was quite a diatribe), I was involved in this blue sky thinking. We were talking about the ideal school: what it looked like; how it ran; who was responsible for what; how the kids acted; what programs were offered; the list went on and on. In short, it was a perfect world for each of us in turn because, as we quickly learned, one person's ideal school was certainly not that of another.

After a long deliberation among some clever thinkers, we came up with a philosophy that would work. We were gung-ho: we were eager to pass it on to those with whom we worked.

Before that could happen, I was asked to deliver the prospect to all the members of the Boss Squad (naturally they have a real name, but I'll keep that to myself). Whoa. Talk about a rush to the head. Surrounded by the principal, vice principals, and all the men and woman who made those sorts of instrumental changes that regularly influence the school in palpable ways, I gave a 40-minute presentation about what we'd discussed. I was so excited, so amped, so privileged to be asked to be a part of it. As a direct result, I was calm and ready to present these same bits of information to my team and a few others.

Gulp.

I shouldn't have been so self-assured. They tore me apart: they asked questions to which I didn't have any answer; they questioned the rationale behind it all; they wanted to know more specific details than I had; they were not thrilled. I think more upsetting than my not being prepared fully for this was the underlying negative energy I got from the group. Though some were excited (and most saw the intrinsic value in the proposal), it was still overall a meeting headlined by Debbie Downer.

So I wanted to cry at one point. I wanted to lash out at another point. I wanted to use the phrase, "shut up" at yet another point. Many thoughts crossed my mind and yet, through it all, I maintained my composure. I took deep breaths, wrote down all the concerns, and moved the conversation along. I was firm: I was direct. I told the team that this had been decided and if we all "played along" it would work really, really well. Conversely, if we took a backseat and waited to see it fail, it most certainly would. I endeavoured to keep the energy level high, the questions flowing, and the answers simple.

In the end, I was deflated, defeated, and yet, surprisingly hopeful. I thought, "Well Bergamo, you could either slump down and proclaim it a failure, or you can rectify the issues and come back stronger next time." I obviously opted for the latter, but it begs the question,

What do YOU do when the going gets rough and the players are not on your side?

* Pics are mine from Riomaggiore.