Going the Distance

"I'm a distance runner. I've been trained to keep going even when it's hard. When it hurts. When it sucks. When I don't want to. I look past it. Relentless forward progress to the finish. Call it what you want; stubbornness, endurance, determination, guts. Deep down, I don't know how to give up. [And it's always worth in the end]."

Author Unknown.

Quote courtesy of Ving-Nation and Speak Words of Hope

When times get really hard, when friends feel a million miles away (both figuratively and literally), when people keep getting sick and there is an infuriatingly small amount you can do about it, when there really are not enough hours in a day, when sleeping feels like a luxury, when ten pm becomes the new 6 pm, when dinner is nothing more than vegetables and hummus because the thought of doing anything else is exhausting, when your brain is so tired from all the thinking and all the working and all the studying and all the writing and all the tutoring...

that's when it's time for a run.

I have never once recalled an awful moment on the pavement. I've fallen. Oh, I've fallen more times than I can count. I've cramped and tripped and blistered and peeled and ripped and torn and split and broke and peed in the woods. But never once have I looked back and said, "I'm never doing that again." Because I've hit the ten kilometer mark and the twelve kilometer mark and the thirty kilometer mark and I've celebrated with fat men and breastfeeding women that we are all the same in our tights and sneakers. I've logged weeks with 50 kilometers and herniated a disc and broke through the back of a shoe.

And it's all a metaphor for what we can accomplish. It's all a run: we're all hitting the pavement. And why I never look back and say, "I'm never doing that again" is why I need to keep hitting the pavement some more. Because eventually I'm going to look back on my life and think the same way about it as I do about running: what a trip...am I ever glad I did that.

Keep running, babies.

Advice

We should be careful and discriminating in all the advice we give. We should be especially careful in giving advice that we would not think of following ourselves. Most of all, we ought to avoid giving counsel which we don't follow when it damages those who take us at our word.

Quote courtesy of Things She Loves

Celebrating Frank

I had a long seven days last week. Weather was wonky (read: windy), I walked to school nearly every day like a pauper, and I had this abundance of work (for work) to do over the weekend as well as a project (for the AQ) that had been completely forgotten about until way too late. I was overwhelmed and missed out on a chance to see One Man Two Guvnors with Erik on Friday night. Now you know me, I'm not a theatre fan (remember The Birdcage on Broadway? Oh, how very painful [followed by "oh, how very enjoyable", I'll admit]), but I was a bit reluctant to stay home instead and mark books until midnight.

On. A. Friday. Night.

I just can't stand shoving everything over until Sunday, hoping that it will magically get done. This way, I could at least say it was over when I awoke on Saturday.

Anyway, after working on Saturday morning then tutoring, I was ready for a night out on the town just to, if for no other reason, get away from the torture chamber that has become my bedroom office for the last few weeks.

I tried on seven outfits and wound up wearing an old favourite, mainly because I didn't have the right coloured tights. I know, right? And so began the pizza-laden, subway-rich evening (that is fairly self-explanatory in the pics)...

We left the restaurant only to take a long subway ride then turn back to the train. The last train leaves for Dartford at about midnight. After that, if one decides to stay out until the Witching Hour, the night bus will eventually take you home. Keri and company got back at 5 am. It's unreal how not my style that was when I was 23, never mind now. 5 am is when you run, not when you pass out on a bus. Yup, to each his own.







And so begins taking pictures of strangers on the subway. Some strangers ;)

...like this guy

...and him.

After the obligatory group shot, the camera was put away and I was homebound.

Happiness

"Happiness can be synthesized."

How happy are we? Are we happy because we got what we wanted...


Image courtesy of This 'n That.

or because we're happy with the things we do have?


Have a peek at this TED Talks and see what you think...






I'm not sure. I've been grappling with this notion for a few weeks now. Friends of mine here in England, who I celebrated birthday wishes with last night, brought up the rather lofty conversation and we started in on it. I'm curious about an answer for myself: am I happier because I got what I wanted or because I'm satisfied with what I do have? Is being satisfied akin to being happy? Is that enough?

Perhaps getting what we want is a bit rudimentary. Perhaps working for what we have is what elevates us from being satisfied to being happy.

I do believe that there is little in the world like the joy that comes from working really hard and relishing in one's accomplishments. So maybe, for me, happiness comes from working at it, getting it, and loving it.

Then does it mean I'm not happy if I want to change it as soon as I have it? I mean, I got a second degree so I could be a teacher. It's all well and good, but is it enough? I'm happy with my career choice, but I want every door to be open to me. I want to educate myself further to ensure I have choice when I want the choice. Does that make me unhappy in my decision? Is room to improve considered being unsatisfied with a choice?

It's a bit complex, non? Think of you who have children or are trying to have children. They're the ultimate choice...they are the ultimate joy-bringers (for most). Are we unhappy if we remember a life that used to be lived pre-bebe? Are we unhappy if we, at times, wish for the non-parental life? What if we can't imagine happiness unless we have children? Will we ever be fulfilled, contented, satisfied if the kids don't happen?

It's a lot to think about. I'm not sure about it all. I think happiness comes from an element of working hard. Without the struggle, the tenacity, there would be no fruits of our labour to roll around in. Maybe that's why I am so adamantly opposed to lottery.

Thoughts?

(Note: if the link doesn't work, just Google "synthetic happiness on TED talks")

Two hours turns into six

What I thought would be a fairly easy assignment for my Spec Ed AQ turned into a doozy today. No mind, I finished it, but I would so much rather be doing this right now





than moving on to marking Year 9 math books.

Memories of Spain...thanks, Nathan!

The journey

Image courtesy of my first year university roommate, Tamara. Thanks ;)

Competition is a scary thing.

I find myself competing at times with the kids I tutor to come up with a better way to say something; a better sentence; a better expression. I don't tell them I feel this way, but a small part of me rejoices at the thought that I beat them. Sicko, right?

At school it's a little different. I'm elated when they solve mathematical problems and relish in the fact that they often beat me. I'm proud of them then. I don't try to out-solve them. Maybe this is a difference between math or science and literacy: my career versus my passion. I've always wanted to be an English teacher after all, but thought that a life surrounded by numbers would serve me better. It certainly has up to this point, hasn't it?

Back to it though...we compete all the time, don't we?

You haven't heard anything yet!
Wait until you hear my story!
That's f*ckin' nothin' kid!
(One time, when I was your age, I paid a thousand dollars for a quarter ;) hahaha)

Ah yes, I'm a classic one-upper. Sorry: it needed to be said. Even when I try to just listen, a small part of me is trying to steal the spotlight...trying to turn that old story around so that we will be talking about me in just a few short seconds. What a brat. Maybe it's only-child-itis. Maybe I need to rethink how often I'm one-upping.

Because when we get right down to it, life isn't a competition. This isn't about the best story or who knows more people at the right places. This is my life and that is yours. Your story, your journey is as important to you as it can possibly be, regardless of how important it is to me.

Here is the new mantra: If this is a competition, you win. And the picture is so right: this is a journey. It's long and it's complicated and everyday we make choices that affect the rest of the journey. But it's sweet and it's splendid when we take a second to see how far we've come.

Just-do-it-olution:
Stop competing--start journeying

To all my Hamiltonian friends...

I don't know how some people come up with ideas like this, but if you're from the Hammer or know anyone who is, and you know the geography well enough to catch these jokes, you're going to love this blog, Hamilton Ryan Gosling.

Image courtesy of Hamilton Ryan Gosling

Because really, what's not to like? The It Man, the not-so-It City. Loves.

I do hope you're having a swell Wednesday. I'm still marking books, but think I might just throw in the towel soon.

Lexi, lovin' life

Recent Gifts

Friends of mine have recently bought me a better-than-a Nettie Pot and a onesie. The Nettie Pot (or the sold-at-Zellers counterpart), in case you don't know is this saline-filled plastic bottle that one uses to squirt up one's nose. The saline goes up the sinuses and filters out the opposite nostril. When Laura taught me how to use one, she coined the phrase, "Stand up like a real person." Well said.

The onesie is a real doozie. It's a long nightgown (which I haven't slept in since I was eleven) made of flannel. I mean, what more could a gal ask for on a winter's night? Bhahahahah...hilarity tends to ensue after teaching for five periods today, tutoring for an hour, and marking book after book of homework.

These might be the best gifts I've ever received.

Seriously.

Not only are my sinuses cleared on the regular, but I'm wrapped up in this envelope of warmth and, might I say, complete sexiness ;)

Night night!

Anchors Away!

More Beach Scenes

I love playing with the camera, focusing on what's close and then what's far. It's super cool and I'm getting better at it. Again, I'm sure a class is in order, but for now, we have experimentation.

Wight for Hipsters

Along the Water...