skinny love

Images courtesy of wit + delight (swoon) via here and here (respectively)


I wonder sometimes about my own skinny love.

You know you've had one (we all have): we've all clung to something for far too long in the hopes it would turn into something else...in the hopes that something small (or gigantic) would change and make it all just perfect.

I just wonder though if that love will stay with me forever. It certainly hasn't gone anywhere in the three years it's been over...and it certainly didn't go anywhere in the fifteen years (fifteen years...you can't believe how strange it is to see that span of time in print, still after all this time) it took to get to the needing-to-be-over phase. And everyone said it would stay firmly entrenched in my heart until I found someone new to take its place. Hmm...that it did not.

Don't get me wrong...us being us never did lend itself to living a happy, healthy life for any of the parties involved, so I'm not pining for the Ghost. I have been reading a lot of poetry lately, so I'm attune to lines that catch my eye more than normal.

Anyway, I guess I never really thought of this, one of my favourite modern songs, as having ample reason why it fits into that category. I can feel the anguish though...the need to end things but the even-stronger desire to keep hanging on. The begging of the inanimate to do something human: just last. Here are some lyrics. They make me feel a little...something...

Come on skinny love just last the year
Pour a little salt we were never here
My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my
Staring at the sink of blood and crushed veneer

I tell my love to wreck it all
Cut out all the ropes and let me fall
My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my
Right in the moment this order's tall

Letting go might be the hardest part. It's also the most liberating...the most free-falling...the most exhilarating. Eventually what is supposed to happen, happens. Always. And we move on or we don't. Things turn out just as we thought they would or they don't. One thing is for sure: things happen exactly as they're supposed to. And even though Ghosts don't stay firmly planted in the past where they belong, a good haunt is sometimes worth the spook.

Do you ever feel nostalgic? Do you ever think that your first love will linger with you for what feels like forever?